I was in IRC today and came up with the perfect iPhone feature that needs to be implemented within the next 10 days. It is quite brilliant and can save the world of technology from one of their biggest problems….. fanboys.

SHRIKEE does the iPhone have teleport?
SHRIKEE ^^
shep no… but i’m hoping it has a self destruct button so all the fan boys will be wiped off the planet :D
SHRIKEE :(
SHRIKEE i wont use that button
shep yes you will
SHRIKEE and so wouldnt any fanboy
shep cause it will be pretty
SHRIKEE hahah
shep and it will cost extra to press
shep so all the fanboys will press it. because they want to show how cool and pretty their stuff is
shep it’s quite brilliant actually

One of these days Apple is going to take a shit in a box and call it the iTurd and it will cost $500. They will sell out within 2 hours of their release.

HBO is doing it right again. They continue to bring quality programming to the masses. It’s no wonder each year HBO has just as many entries in the Emmy Awards as your standard “free TV” network. They have a long history of great programming, The Sopranos, Arli$$, Six Feet Under, and Entourage. Now they can add Flight of the Conchords to their list.

Entourage started it’s 4th season tonight and it looks like it’s going to be another great season. This show keeps getting better and better. The first episode saw the filming of the Pablo Escobar film Medellin. What keeps the show fresh is that the characters are developing. We see E and Vince risk everything to produce this movie. The “behind the scenes” documentary filming of this first episode was great and something we’ve not seen on the show before. I can’t wait to see the next episode. I love this show.

After Entourage a new show debuted. It’s called Flight of the Conchords and stars the band by the same name. I can’t really explain this show, but think of it as a 30 minute long humorous music video. It was fantastic and I kept laughing the entire time. It will be another hit for HBO. Make sure you check it out. You can check out the band’s website here. Who says summer is for reruns?

Edit: Watch the entire first episode on YouTube thanks to HBO

From CNN:

A 50-ton bowhead whale caught off the Alaskan coast last month had a weapon fragment embedded in its neck that showed it survived a similar hunt — more than a century ago.

Embedded deep under its blubber was a 3½-inch arrow-shaped projectile that has given researchers insight into the whale’s age, estimated between 115 and 130 years old.

“No other finding has been this precise,” said John Bockstoce, an adjunct curator of the New Bedford Whaling Museum.

Calculating a whale’s age can be difficult, and is usually gauged by amino acids in the eye lenses. It’s rare to find one that has lived more than a century, but experts say the oldest were close to 200 years old.

The bomb lance fragment, lodged in a bone between the whale’s neck and shoulder blade, was likely manufactured in New Bedford, on the southeast coast of Massachusetts, a major whaling center at that time, Bockstoce said. read more…

Amazing. I never knew whales could live that long. Very interesting stuff. Found the article via Slashdot

book icon I just read Chuck Palahniuk’s new book Rant: An Oral Biography of Buster Casey. I am a huge fan of Palahniuk’s cynical stories. Reminding me of Vonnegut, Palahniuk spins deep stories about how fucked up the world is and how poor society has become. My favorite book of his, Fight Club is the perfect example of this type of storytelling. In his latest book, Palahniuk does something I’ve never seen done, by him or any other author. The way he tells the story is so unique. The novel is about Buster Casey, but it doesn’t follow like a traditional novel. It is not a story told by the main character, or even one person who knew the main character. Instead it is told by several people who knew the main character. It reads like a series of interviews with various people, almost like several witnesses telling the story of an accident that has happened, telling what they know in each scene until you reach the conclusion. The story was good, but what made the book was the way it was told. It couldn’t have been told any other way. Palahniuk’s outlook on the world still shows through via quotes the “witnesses” give about their friend Buster Casey, whether it be about his general character or actual things he said (“The future you have tomorrow won’t be the same future you had yesterday.”) These people, like the men in Fight Club are constantly looking for more in life, death, relationships, and challenging the status quo. These themes are seen all throughout his books. In case you are interested, here is a synopsis from amazon.com:

Buster Casey, destined to live fast, die young and murder as many people as he can, is the rotten seed at the core of Palahniuk’s comically nasty eighth novel (after Haunted; Lullaby; Diary; etc.). Set in a future where urbanites are segregated by strict curfews into Daytimers and Nighttimers, the narrative unfolds as an oral history comprising contradictory accounts from people who knew Buster. These include childhood friends horrified by the boy’s macabre behavior (getting snakes, scorpions and spiders to bite him and induce instant erections; repeatedly infecting himself with rabies), policemen and doctors who had dealings with the rabies “superspreader”; and Party Crashers, thrill-seeking Nighttimers who turn city streets into demolition derby arenas. After liberally infecting his hometown peers with rabies, Buster hits the big city and takes up with the Party Crashers. A series of deaths lead to a police investigation of Buster (long-since known as “Rant”—the sound children make while vomiting) that peaks just as Buster apparently commits suicide in a blaze of car-crash glory. This dark religious parable (there’s even a resurrection) from the master of grotesque excess may not attract new readers, but it will delight old ones.

computer icon So the web is full of fanboy talk after the long circle-jerk orchestrated by Jobs today. One of the biggest things Mac fanboys are heralding is Safari on Windows. Well, here’s my thoughts. So what? I downloaded the browser to see what all the hype (which is 90% of what Apple products are) was about. The browser, on Windows, sucks. It’s said to be the best browser in the world. Yeah right. The browser is supposed to render websites faster than Firefox, IE, and Opera, but I noticed no difference. It was clunky, had very few options as far as customization goes and has no plugin support. So why is this the best browser ever? I also think that the claim of being faster is bogus. Going to several websites, it seemed to go slower than other browsers, except IE7. They put Opera as the slowest browser, but Opera has always gone faster out of the box than IE7 on the two machines I run it on. Safari is clunky, ugly, and pretty much just a general POS. (This is where I’d get flamed by fanboys who say it’s because it’s on Windows…. but you know what, that’s what this was made for, Windows, and it still is shitty). Do yourself a favor and stick with Opera or Firefox. IE7 sucks as well, so don’t use that one either, but hey, at least IE7 has more options and plugin support.

Being a blogger, I had to post about a Mac announcement at least once. There it was. Continue on with your regularly scheduled program. And read this if you have a chance.

Update: The “best browser in the world” keeps getting better. Security holes found within hours of it’s release.